my bet to my life

i never joke wif life
but i hav my bet for my life

sky's blue
blood's red
n the dark blood that stained on her angel wings
under this blue sky
the ugly world

n i made my world messy than b4
of my career, which being lazy to work o even think
as my mind has been rejecting everthing that comes to me
wasting so much time for colleague but in the end disappointed of how they treated me(few)
n study
another bet for the pounds to the so called professional lines of study
n my will has never come out of the word, study

sad life isn;t it
at least better than ppl who happened to hav bad news in news
poisoned milk from china, what a shamed for them
yet i had forecasted this may happen one day
coz china not really care for hygiene except for beijing ever since they qualified for olympic 2008

anwar's "revenge"
doesn't seems to b hot these days
maybe a new change of the so called G may b a good idea to benefits us all'
at least the better words is, he serve for all races

leaving my ps3 downstair
few days din touch her but psp
having real fun whn playing STAR WARS: UNLEASHED
that is so cool til i played till the batt flatted
yet i know ps3 ver is too much better compare to psp ver
i wont wanan giv a try
else my pockets gonne bleeds more

pockets bleeding
mainly due to the happy news around me these days
angie's baby full moon, spend quite a number of money buy clothes for her bb
yet i never hav such expensive clothes when i was full moon of age on this mother land
n soon one of my member of RC gonna married
hav to prepare ang po for them of coz -.-
well
keep keep bleeding my pockets

i lost the ability to "survive"
on carreer n study
til now i stil dono what to do
lack of confidence doing these days
yea... i'm lost
i;ve lost
under the sea stars

juz dealed wif someone who sell me his rims
16" taiwan rims
someone who prove their will to sell
using a celica which is rich ppl's toy to carry 4 rims juz for my request
in a reasonable price
i accept the deal
not bcoz of the rimz
but the will he did to sell
n things that is what i wan
thanks to him very much
hope it wont occur much problem when i wanan do "sth" wif the rims

yet these days sth came into my mind
not only the autogauge meters
i hav other plan
to benefit me n ppl around
hope this will work
if bro support me then would b easier

i know the destination i wanna b
it juz
i lost my path for her mother land

confused of what's in my mind
yet i lost too much confident

n i'm sick of ya all

傻傻的天氣

"Love's beautiful~~~ so beautiful~~~"
蔡健雅的beautiful love, 相信許多人已聽過一段時間了, 但給我來說, 我很喜歡這首歌, 那種感覺...

傻傻欲可愛的天氣, 看起來有點懶惰, 但這幾天未哭泣, 希望今晚看到如母親般的月亮...

到底我是為什麼而做一切, 最終目的我還是不知道, 或許我根本不喜歡浪費時間...

這孤獨的單身日子, 或許只能把愛獻給我的戰車, 看今天天氣不錯, 剛買了一瓶蠟皇想打蠟, 但二哥駕了出去還未回來... -.-

工作也帶了回家, 因為在公司捉蛇太利害, 自由這樣才不會讓他人說閒話...

我在想
諾可以得到我所要的一切...
我想這個世界會因這樣而顯的沒有樂趣...
這邊是命運...

而機會...
仿佛九如身邊遇到的事情這麼去處理..
也就是選擇的權力...

命運與機會的遊戲
或許因為這樣而有點意思

tough feeling

n damn this world
for making me being so down n sad

i juz can;t stop myself from expressing myself using the old style way i used to me
damn this world of freaks that giving me the hard feeling that pressures my heart being so pain
damn!

somehow i juz feel kinda
very lost

i can;t cool myself down but only to keep on keying everything inside here
i juz dono why i can't do things i really wan, i can get everything i tried hard, but y not in relationship
n damn did all these things really caused by me!?
this is not what i wan
i juz feel so pain

it's not the case of i made lots of joke
but i gav lots of hope
n i was being like a fool n fooled like a kid wans a sweet but the sweet can never get into the kid's mouth

i juz duno why i can;t stop thinking this way
feeling as if u brought yr tickets for flight but the flight fly earlier b4 u reached to check in

there's no light in the end of the tunnel

i'm so sorry i hav to say so

but i hav to trust my feeling
coz my feeling always tell the right way i should

since from the begining
of every nightmares that fall n made me ambushed


yet
i stil like the way loving perfectionism
being perfect for everything i can

i gav the wrong bet
wrong game from the begining
i tot this would b the last angel i would go for
yet
i'm lucky enuf i never push my very last hope to this damn game

u may say i'm being like a fox complain the grapes being sour since it don hav the chance to eat
but sorry
u;re wrong
even if i;m a fox, i rather choose other in case of those grapes

i dono why do i make myself so hard for everything

n damn this feeling

i never feel good

i;m impatient
coz i never wanan get hurted
this only shorten my life in the end

i must say
my life isn;t short
but i scare my life is not long enuf for my dreams

i start to lose most of hope to this world
there;s no angel
angels r not in this human-being world
nor the devils

only the ugliest human being that is destroying their home
betraying their minds n souls

i appologise for being human
from heart
bcoz i stil hav the heart that keeps me alive
either to change this ugly world
o to watch this world til the very doom end...

yet i;ve tried my very best
n i;m sorry i can make any different in the very end

to my soul, my love to this world...

失味

我也不懂我在想什麼...
但我只能說, 我知道我在做什麼...

離考試還有三個月, 但我還為真正去打開書學習...
但我不會有放棄的念頭, 不然這世界...

對我來說, 就少了點樂趣...


我的心還未活, 或許只是我的意識真在堅持在人間的身軀...

是乎好像找到目標的天使, 但或許還得花點時間與心思...

這天陰沉沉的, 看示低調, 或許也因為這樣我的心情也有點低調

冷靜的思考與情緒, 往往對很多人來說...
在感情上, 是起不了作用...
這也是我的弱點之一...
除非你更本不把感情看重...

也因為這樣, 我有點迷失了我的方向...
在這星海下, 唯有星星是地圖...

我欲等待那流星的出現, 帶領我會到那快樂的原點...


如果要我放棄一切, 下定決心的我是做不到...
即使惡魔再度回來尋找我的影子...
只要心還唯有死的決議, 這是不可能被帶走的...


往往就如用勁了力氣, 也拉不逕天與地的距離般...
認為自己做了一切能做的事, 最終也沒得到自己想要的結果...
這也很諷刺, 最終也忘了最初是為了什麼而做...

天很暗, 心就像被壓般的難受...
世界是這麼黑暗的話, 我的心靈又能堅持多久...

在倒下的那一刻, 腦海中出現了許多畫面...
使未來還是過去, 感覺痛苦, 而且很久, 醒來發現只不過是一瞬間罷了...
如死亡邊緣般...
諾不醒來, 記憶可能如電影中斷般的結束...

我很認真, 對於我的一切, 我的生命...
看示幼稚的我, 只不過是想逃離這現實的黑暗...
難道這世界沒希望了嗎?

反正一切已經不重要了...